Children think money grows on trees. Maybe not literally, but they sure think there is a never-ending supply of it. They see you at the grocery store pushing a cart overflowing with the week’s groceries; you hand the cashier a piece of plastic and suddenly it’s all yours. People come to the door asking for money to support a charity and it magically appears from the bottom of your purse as if you were pulling a rabbit from a hat. Instead of “mama” or “dada”, “checkbook” might have been your child’s first word. It makes no sense to them then, that every time they ask for something they’d like from the store the answer is usually no. How do you teach the value of money to a child?

Is an allowance the answer?

Many parents think that giving an allowance is a good way to teach their children about money. There are two schools of thought on this issue. One theory is that the child completes a few agreed upon tasks and receives a small payment at the end of the week. Then, if he sees something he’d like in a store, he would be told to save his allowance in order

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The formula is pretty straightforward: energy in/energy out. This is the term nutritionists use to describe the intended balance between calories consumed and calories burned. If the level of physical activity is not great enough to burn the amount of calories taken in, weight increases. If this imbalance continues, overweight and possibly obesity result.

Given our fondness for fast food (an ever-growing fondness, due to ever-busier lives) and our tendency to "supersize," it’s easy to imagine that caloric intake is the crux of the obesity problem. And certainly it is part of the problem, especially considering the quality of the calories consumed. (Recent evidence indicates that children get a full quarter of their vegetable servings in the form of potato chips and French fries!) But the greater problem lies with the second half of the equation: energy out.

Studies both here and abroad have indicated this is true. The Framingham Children’s Study, for example, found that preschool children with low levels of physical activity gained significantly more subcutaneous (beneath the skin) fat than did more active children. In another study it was determined that inactive preschoolers were 3.8 times more likely than active preschoolers to have increased triceps skinfold thickness (the best

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Life is funny.

My twenty-year-old daughter, Melanie, has a her new summer job as a nanny for three small children. She’s an aspiring operatic soprano who was whisked off to a rich suburb near Manhattan the day after her finals had ended at the Eastman School of Music. Her mother and I miss her dreadfully. Thank God for our Family Talk Plan!

Last night, she called home and as we discussed my upcoming book signing at Borders, she called out, "You two need to pipe down and go to sleep! I don’t want to hear one more peep out of you!"

I doubled over with laughter. The tears streamed down my cheeks. The tone and emphasis was identical to my own words uttered night after night to Melanie and her twin sister, Allison, when they were little. When she came back on the phone, she joined in my laughter.

"You know, Dad, it’s weird. I’m turning into you and mom. I’m so strict, I’m worried all the time about them! I hear you in my own voice each time I talk to them! And when did I learn all the lyrics to these Raffi songs?"

I thought about her comments as I drove past Wal-Mart

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Having a baby is one of the most exciting times of your life. It is also one of the most stressful. So many decisions have to be made about nearly every aspect of your baby’s comfort, safety, and happiness. You spend hours pouring over pregnancy and child rearing books, picking out the perfect crib, finding the most adorable and comfortable clothing, and envisioning the safest and most peaceful birth for your baby as possible. No doubt somewhere in your planning you have thought about how many diapers you will need for your new little one and perhaps you have even purchased some in advance. If you are like the majority of parents out there, then you have automatically decided upon disposable diapers without ever giving it a second thought. Stop right there! There is an alternative; consider using cloth diapers.

Cloth diapering today is not what it used to be. When many parents think of cloth diapers they think of flat diapers that need to be folded in several, origami-like folds and fastened with diaper pins before they are covered with plastic pull on pants. Generally they also think that the clean-up involved with using cloth diapers would be tedious and

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Do you live with an ADD / ADHD child? If so– my hat is off to you! ADD / ADHD children are brilliant, full of energy, smart as a whip (as grandma says), and tons of work. They are also the rising sun and the setting star: meaning much of life revolves around them in one way or another. One tactic you might employ is to: be your child’s best friend.

Hear me out just a bit. I am not promoting parents in “jammies” all day– everyday, messy homes filled with increasing whirlwind clutter that no-one attends to, nor hot dogs and pizza nightly just to avoid more arguing with an ADD / ADHD child. I am suggesting the reminder we all need with these special needs children: keep perspective.

And yes– try thinking along the lines of being best friends with your child.

Best friends are people who look out for the best interest of another.

Best friends have a special tolerance for each other.

Best friends set aside time to truly know each other and how each other thinks and feels.

Best friends stand up for one-another, for their rights, their feelings, their health, and their needs.

Best friends look forward to more time together.

Best

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Here’s a scene: A parent “might suddenly grab a happliy playing child and shower him with excited hugs and kisses without warning.” What’s wrong with this picture?

I would say that, simply, the parent is not in synch with the child in the case described above. The parent is not on the same page. Yes, parents have to move over to their child’s page to be “on the same page”, not the other way around, starting in infancy. Parents who have no history of being treated with any sensitivity at all will have a hard time with this. But–here’s the clincher–giving up is not an option! Here is how to practice getting more and more able to “read” what page someone is on

Step 1: Guess what they’re thinking/experiencing at the moment and explain to yourself why you think so.

Step 2: Check it out with the person. In a very casual way, just say, “You know, I want to be a more aware person. I’m trying to understand you a little better, so I hope you’ll help me. What I’m trying to do now is guess how you feel and why. Can I run by you what I came up with?”

Step 3:

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In seminars I am often asked about pocket-money and whether it should be earned or only given when children behave well.

My belief is that children should receive pocket-money as their small share of the family-wealth just as they should share the workload at home. This is not to say that the family income is divided equally between all members. Rather, children are given a realistic sum of money, given their age, needs and ability to deal with money.

It makes sense to provide guidelines about spending including letting them know just what they are expected to buy. A child in lower primary school may get enough to purchase some sweets and one or two other items, whereas a child in upper primary school may get enough to cover lunch orders, bus money and some treats. An allowance that covers clothing can be useful for adolescents who can be very costly to outfit in the latest fashions. Let them know you will buy the basics items and that they can make up the difference between brand names and basic items from their pocket-money.

Pocket-money can teach children a great deal about goal-setting. By encouraging children to save for a big ticket item such

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I have always found the notion of toilet training a toddler to be a bit much. I didn’t feel right about pushing my girls to do something I felt would eventually come naturally. At three years old, both my girls were potty trained … not because I read books and raced them to the porcelain each time I suspected they should go. They knew what the potty was for. They knew when they had to go. They’d figure it out on their own! Well, by golly, they did!

Sure, we went a little stupid each time they were successful users of the throne and they got rewards and accolades just like the kids who were put through a regimen of potty training tactics fit for Patton’s soldiers. But we never made it a big issue in our house and, consequently, it never became an issue.

I’ve known parents who felt they had to potty train their babies at two or even younger to enroll them in preschool. We, instead, found a great preschool that accepted kids in diapers. Their philosophy was that the children who were still in diapers would naturally learn to go on the potty by watching the other kids

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Something eerily familiar happened in KwaZulu-Natal’s Hluhluwe-Umfolozi Park in Africa recently.

The adult elephants were taken away and the orphaned youngsters were left to fend for themselves.

The youngsters started the path to sexual maturity. The young boys were going into lengthy ‘musths’, as a dog would go into heat, much longer than a normal elephant in a normal setting.

The boys ganged together. They started raping and killing white rhinos, an endangered species. They were displaying extreme aggression. The park authorities were very concerned.

Someone had the idea to bring in ten adult bulls to “straighten out” the gang of elephant thugs.

Sure enough, the mature males put the band of so called ‘delinquent juveniles’ in their place. The adults were reintroduced, and life turned back to normal. No more killings. The elephants and rhinos were at peace again.

Obviously, strong male and female presence’s are needed in these elephants lives. The young elephants needed the adults from when they were defenseless babies through the time they were in their elephant ‘teenage’ years.

In the meantime, over in the United States of America there was another gang related murder in your city. Another fatherless, semi or fully orphaned teenager shot a man and then reported back

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When it comes to exams, or indeed any academic work, parents feel that they should be encouraging their teen to try hard and do well. The problem is that in trying to achieve this, many parents end up causing stress either for themselves, their teen or both.

So what causes this stress? Basically, it boils down to one key belief; a belief held by many parents and one that is reinforced by most schools.

To do well you must work hard

Consequently parents spend much of their time trying to get their teens to word hard. The sad fact is that there are some students who could work hard for the rest of their life and still achieve only mediocre results. And then there are other students who appear to put in very little effort and still do well.

This belief leads parents to think one of two things, either their teen is working hard enough or they’re not. Either way, unhelpful stress can still be a problem.

If your teen is working hard enough

Usually the person who gets over-stressed in this situation is the teen. The parent’s role here is to help their teen manage the stress. Beware of ‘going over the top’ in

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